An official website of the United States government
Here's how you know
A .mil website belongs to an official U.S. Department of Defense organization in the United States.
A lock (lock ) or https:// means you’ve safely connected to the .mil website. Share sensitive information only on official, secure websites.

From one spouse to another

  • Published
  • By Erin Bucholz
  • 375th Civil Engineer Squadron Key Spouse
We've been celebrating May as Military Spouse Appreciation Month because all spouses play a critical part in their military member's career. We are part of their support system and, hopefully, their reason to be excited to come home at the end of the day or at the end of a deployment. Here are a few thoughts about our lives as military spouses:

Thousands of miles

We are called up to travel worldwide with our spouses. We leave behind friends and family to support our spouse. We make new friends and create a family out of our military community, and then in a few years we move away from those people, too. This is both the gift and one of the more difficult parts of being a military spouse. Sometimes we do it gracefully and sometimes we go kicking and screaming. We are human, after all.

Hours spent worrying

Our spouses are deployed frequently, which causes our families to spend special days and holidays apart. This is difficult for all of us; however, we believe the mission they're supporting is important, so we support them. Even though at times we cannot communicate or do not know where in the world they may be, we believe that our sacrifice is for a greater good, and because of that, we do our part.


From Italy to Minot, and everywhere in between, we make our houses our homes for the time we are there. Sometimes it seems like our boxes have just been unpacked and we are packing them again, but therein lies part of the adventure of our military life.

New schools and jobs

We are resilient. We get our children into new school systems. We learn all we can about our communities so we can make sure our kids will be well cared for. We polish our resumes over and over again, and continue to work to improve ourselves in our career. None of this is easy, but all of it is necessary.


When you marry a military member you become familiar with PCS, TDY and lots of acronym soup. This new lingo and military jargon takes time to learn, but we do it over time and with a little help from all our friends and the supportive military community.

Your Support

It's true that life isn't always peachy, our moves don't go perfectly smooth, and we miss something or someone from our last duty station. That's why it's important to know what resource agencies, such as the Airmen and Family Readiness Center, have to offer. There are many resources and activities that are designed to support families and parents while they are apart due to deployments and other long separations. Life is not perfect and neither are we, but supporting each other through life's challenges is one of the things that the military community works hard to do.

Open to new challenges

I'm proud to be a military spouse because of the other spouses around me. Some of you have home businesses, others of you are investing in your children, and still others have found new jobs or are attending new schools to continue to pursue your goals. I'm amazed by what you all continue to do throughout your journey and it inspires others.


When you really stop to think about it, we have an unbelievable life. We have friends all over the world, a spouse who has answered the highest calling--service to our country--and many experiences that we would never have dreamt of. However, more importantly, you are unbelievable because you accomplish everything that is asked of you in this crazy, exciting, ever changing role as a military spouse.

As a military spouse, our job is vital not only to our spouse, but also to the overall mission that is accomplished at the base around us. Please know that you are seen. Your hard work is not taken for granted and we "thank you."

The awesome work that our spouses are able to do is in part because of you. Please know that you are not alone in this.

If you do not know who the Key Spouse is for your squadron please take a minute to find out. Your Key Spouses work hard to be there to support you. From one spouse to another, thank you for being a military spouse. We could not do it without your help, and know that we are happy to return the favor.